Monday, April 14, 2008

am i being a hard-ass?

Hey, if you break down and cry at work when you've just received the call that your parent has been taken to hospital, or when you've fallen and broken your leg into several pieces, I'll be the first one to hand you a tissue. But people who randomly cry at work--maybe because they feel they've been mistreated, or because they're super in touch with their emotions--make me long for a time when robots might run the workplace. I'd like to get my performance review from C-3PO. Really.

I have to admit that I'm not really into crying to begin with (who are all those people who bawl during movies like Beaches and Yentl?!) but I can't begrudge people the right to cry in the privacy of their own home or car or trailer or backyard or any other place where I am not. But is it too much to ask people not to cry in the bathroom we share at work or in the cafeteria from which I also need to buy my lunch? I think I sound really British when I say this (and British I am not), but crying to me just seems kind of private.

Last week I got sent to an "inspirational" (quotation marks intended) business speech. The speaker was a well-known television personality who has built up quite a brand for herself. Her topic was her ten important hints for business success. Partway through her number one hint she started to cry. Soon the crying turned to sobbing. It went on for so long that I began to wonder where all the moisture was coming from. Were there secret onions in there somewhere?

And all of this was in front of an audience of about 500 people. Not that I was a big fan to begin with, but I will no longer be able to look at her with any respect.



Complaint Department Manager said...

It kind of depends on what she was saying. If what she said brought up a painful memory then I guess it would be okay. But then again, if you know it will make you cry, then strike it from the presentation because at that time, you are inflicting self damage for gain and that to me is pathetic. Overall, if it was a one time thing, then yes it's okay. If she's going around and crying at every single presentation then absolutely not. If I know it's on purpose, I'll purposely go to sleep, laugh or eat something loud hoping she'd hear me, you know that whole annoying movie theater patron thing.

Emory said...

Many Sapiens are little more empathetic to situations than others. I suppose by being English I am more the 'stiff upper lip' sort. It's not that I am not empathetic, its that I am ruled by Aries and more quick to be angered in action than submit to tear - by nature.

I do get bothered by the circumstances of others - I am saddened when I see elderly people cry for instance. Something about age should be more life revealing, I think. If you are crying in old age, then I guess life is as difficult as some Poetry suggests.

I do get upset with poverty. Children in poverty especially, I find disgraceful.

When younger women cry, I have learned that it is generally part of that 'Secret Garden' they share with one another. I sort of understand it, but let it run it's course.

Business however, is all venom and blades.

I suppose have the reputation (undeserved) of being a hard ass. Emotionally detached; robotic and calculating even - in business. It's all a sham and I have argued (behind closed doors) against job cuts and lay-offs repeatedly in the last few months. Funny, the same cretins that that think I am out to cut them, are the same cretins I fight to keep - well most of them.

True, I will cut someones ass in minute; but never for crying.

So are you being a hard ass? No I doubt it. The human tree is full of different Monkeys, and we chatter in the branches at differing wave lengths - and in our own way.

Whiner Girl said...

This post made me think. I'm not even sure what I think about it at this point. I keep vacillating between view points and am unsure which I fell is the best. Hmmm. As usual, you've made me think. This one may result in a response via post on my blog ... I don't know.

Complaint Department Manager said...


Whiner Girl said...

HEY!! You two are missed!!! I hope it's not a tragedy that's keeping you two away. E.T. phone home!!!

Emory said...

10 theories on the sudden silence.

1. Sunnyshine, on one of her undercover secret agent trips has been abducted by the Shinning Path Guerilla's - proberbly trying to free her French counterpart. Rainy had been tapped for insertion into the mountainous jungle, but lost communication after her SAT equipment was ripped from her during the HALO parachute jump.

2. Sunny and Rainy have had a spat. Possibly due to Rainy's dreadful soy chicken offering she put together for Sunny - doubtful that a 'boy toy' was involved.

3. Rainy has purchased a parking space (8'X 18') and now has let her internets/webs connection subscription lapse; as she is spending most of her time on it. She keeps it neatly swept and has even painted the lines.

4. We (the readers of Complainaway) are a social experiment. Dr.s Sunny and Rainy have gathered all the data they needed from us and now they are having their work put into the The New England Journal of Medicine. Hooray.... we are lab rats.

5. Alien abduction OR Sunny and Rainy are really Grey's and have returned to wherever the hell Grey's live. Please see UFO theories.

6. Sunny and Rainy have an audience with the Queen - they don't have time for us little people anymore.

7. Sunnys roof finally collapsed, pinning Rainy. Too proud to ask for help, Sunny is now extrocating Rainy by whittling her out of the debris using a grapefruit spoon.

8. They are both in Texas, trying to get their children back.

9. They are out riding

10. Oh dear what can the matter be. Sunny and Rainy trapped in lavatory. They have been there from Sunday to Saturday and nobody knew they where there.